Building Connections in a New City
Making friends as an adult can be challenging, particularly after relocating internationally. When Nidhi Pal, 38, and Vik Parashar, 46, moved from India to Belfast, they discovered that although locals were warm and welcoming, forming enduring relationships was not easy.
To broaden their social circle, the couple devised an unconventional approach: hosting a dinner party with 10 strangers.
"We thought, if no one is calling us in, we will call them in, and open our door,"
Nidhi said.
Vik noted that initiating friendships in "a different culture and a different language" posed difficulties.
After spending two years in Belfast, Nidhi became aware of their social isolation.
"I suddenly realised that we have no friends, no social life, and as a mature adult, I didn't know how to make any."
Back in India, the couple enjoyed cooking for friends and hosting celebrations. Seeking to recreate that sense of community, they launched an Instagram page named Masala Talkies and shared an online form inviting anyone interested to join their dinners.
Individuals of diverse ages and backgrounds from Belfast and beyond responded, and Nidhi selected groups of ten she believed would interact well together.
Curating the Dinner Experience
Inviting strangers into their home was initially daunting. Applicants were asked about their personality traits and interests.
Questions included whether they preferred to observe quietly, engage in deep one-on-one conversations, or be the lively presence that could turn strangers into a family.
Nidhi and Vik used these responses to thoughtfully assemble the dinner guests.
"You're going by what they put on the form, and you're going with your gut,"
Nidhi explained.
"We've been very fortunate to make a lot of friends so far, but it is nerve-wracking."
Six months into the project, they were hosting their sixth dinner, with the author as the tenth guest.
Nidhi and Vik prepared an Indian meal featuring six courses, each representing a different Indian city.
Guests included locals from Belfast and two Indian students studying in the city centre.
Community Amidst Tensions
This dinner held special significance as it followed several days of anti-immigration protests and violent demonstrations in Northern Ireland.
"I know that isn't the real Belfast,"
Nidhi said, expressing gratitude for the chance to demonstrate that Belfast is different from its external portrayal.
Kayva, 25, an Indian student, felt the timing was important.
"After the riots and anti-immigration protests, I was receiving loads of videos which were very disturbing. People throwing rocks and burning houses. It was terrifying,"
she said.
"I wanted to come to Nidhi and Vik's supper because I felt so far away from home. I wanted to feel safe, comfortable, and at home."
Julia, 55, from east Belfast, also reflected on the experience.
"Meeting Nidhi and Vik at home after the riots this week made it all the more poignant,"
she said.
"It's made me more determined to get to know people who live in my area, even if they're not from the same country."
A Growing Circle of Friends
For Nidhi, life has transformed since opening their home to strangers.
"Six months ago, I knew nobody here, even though I'd been here for two years.
I have someone I can call now. I feel that I belong here, which is what I was looking for."
Vik stated that although they have achieved their goal of making new friends, their journey continues.
"Now we have 60 friends after six dinners.
That's a beautiful feeling, because you know that when you go outside, there might be someone you know.
I am very greedy. I want the whole world to be my friend. So as long as we have the time and the energy, we'll keep inviting people.
We're not doing anything special. We just ask that people try our food, sit with us, listen to us, talk about themselves, share their stories and laugh together."
